The sultry glances were brief, but often. With fluttering eyelashes and a slightly demure smile, there was no mistaking her intentions—to capture the attention of that handsome guy sitting nearby.
A normal display of romancing? Absolutely! A common age for such conquest? Sometimes. The flirtatious female in the scenario above was only in fourth grade. Yes, true story. I observed the hour-long exchange of glances while subbing at a local elementary school during their holiday program last December. This child had more on her mind than singing “Jingle Bells”!
Old enough—really??
The thing is, adolescence—and all matters related—doesn’t happen at a specific age or grade level. In fact, it may be earlier than most parents want to think about!
Since it has been a few years back for most of us—let’s review a bit regarding this awkward season of life known as puberty. From the onset of puberty to its end, it takes somewhere between 3-5 years for both guys and girls to make it through this time of adjustment. A lot of changes are happening to their bodies, usually from mid-elementary school through mid-high school (at least).
Some kids continue to develop physically into their twenties, but most have made it through the majority of changes by age 16 or 17. These differences begin with hormones and then trigger physical development such as:
- Armpit hair
- Voice deepening (males)
- Breast development
- Acne
- Body odor
- Hairy legs
- Pubic hair
- Body fat redistribution (females)
- Facial hair
How do kids feel about it?
Most likely, you can remember how you felt during these somewhat embarrassing years of change. Your kids are experiencing it as well—whether they verbally tell you or not!
- Scared
For some kids, puberty is kind of scary. They were accustomed to the way their bodies looked and functioned in past years, but now everything looks and feels different (inside and out). You think you don’t know your child anymore. Well, sometimes they don’t recognize themselves either! It’s that confusing.
- Awkward
Your child may begin growing at a rapid pace in height or weight, which makes dressing and keeping up with a wardrobe somewhat of a challenge as well. For girls, it can be difficult to find clothing that fits their developing body without looking too mature or revealing. For guys, it may simply be a matter of keeping pants that are long enough for their growing legs (or waistline).
- Emotional
Your child is on an emotional rollercoaster of sorts. It’s not uncommon to see drastic mood swings in them several times through any given day! But try not to let it get you unraveled as well.
Keep in mind that many times when your child suddenly erupts in anger or tears, it’s the hormones “talking” more than anything. This stage, too, shall pass. Until then, hang in there with all the patience you’ve got!
Reach out to other parents you know with kids of similar age to compare notes. Or, if you know of someone whose children are now just a bit older than yours, talk with them as well to see how they maneuvered the rough years of raising adolescents. Through these parent-to-parent conversations, you’ll discover that you and your teen will make it through these tough years just fine.