Do you ever wonder why some couples have better communication skills and intimacy from day one of their marriage, while others seem to crater within the first year? Or why some of your married friends make it through difficult times better than other couples you know?
According to a February 2017 article The Trends Redefining Romance Today by The Barna Group, 52% of American adults are married, and those who are currently divorced remain so at about 10%. Approximately twenty-five percent of all adults have been divorced at some point in their lifetime. Most Americans want to be married at some point in their life, and they hope to remain married to the same person.
Why prepare for marriage with counseling?
It is estimated that ninety-five percent of all adults eventually marry. One of the best ways to prepare for a healthy, life-long marriage is to have pre-marital counseling prior to the wedding day. Since marriage is one of the most important decisions a person makes in his or her lifetime, it is so important that it is approached with the seriousness that it deserves. A successful marriage is hard work that requires the best preparation for it to be the meaningful and wonderful experience God intended when He established the home.
What to expect in your first pre-marital counseling session
Generally, there is time given to the following aspects:
- Getting acquainted with your counselor to determine length and depth of relationship with your fiancé
- Discussion of couple’s family backgrounds
- Goal-setting and understanding of goals for the pre-marital counseling process
- Discussion of issues that may need to be addressed
- Confidentiality explanation of information shared during counseling sessions
- Discussion of the biblical basis for marriage, as well as time for each person to share his/her faith journey.
Homework assignments are made at the end of each session, and information is provided for the couple to complete the online pre-marital inventory. This inventory will be used to determine areas that need special focus during upcoming sessions.
What will be covered during other pre-marital counseling sessions?
- Challenges faced in marriage
- Love language of each person
- Spirituality
- Roles expectations
- Communication styles
- Marriage expectations
- The DISC Personality Inventory
- Needs of each person
- Intimacy and healthy sexuality
- Conflict management
- Money management
- Thoughts regarding “The ideal mate”
- Thorough discussion of the Prepare/Enrich Inventory
Over the years as I have asked Christian women what they wanted most from their husbands, their responses were:
- A spiritual leader for their home
- Someone who romanced them throughout their marriage
- A good communicator
- A personal encourager
- Someone who helps take care of practical things around the house
Information and expectations similar to these will be shared during the counseling sessions.
You will see early on in your marriage that pre-marital counseling was the best investment you made for the successful start and future of your relationship.